Last week the kiddo was sick. That translated into lots of hours on the couch watching HGTV. What can I say, we both like renovation shows. Anyway, I saw the new HUM commercials like 400 times each. There are two of them. And they both drove me mad.
Commercial A) Family returns from vacation, close up on Dad looking forlornly for car in airport parking. Mom pulls out cell phone and uses GPS on HUM to find car. “Follow me boys.” And they all traipse after her like little sheep.
That was cute, the first time.
Commercial B) Check engine light comes on in the car. Family, mom driving, pulls over. Dad gets out to look under the hood. Mom rolls her eyes and calls HUM. They tell her it’s the oxygen censor and that she can drive on home, then get it checked out. Mom tells Dad who says, I need my tools. Cue two girls in the back seat rolling eyes at Dad too.
This one rubbed me wrong from the get go. Sure it looks like a cute little commercial about how clueless men are. In fact, both play on that fact. Men are clueless. Women are the smart savvy ones who know to install technology so they can have more super powers. Yay women!
But let’s look a little deeper. We have slid into a culture where men occupy two roles.
A) demonic oppressors of women and minorities everywhere
B) clueless bumbling idiots
Neither are a true, complete picture. Both are damaging to the functionality of society as a whole and healthy organism. In both, the children are being taught not to respect their father. Mom lumps Dad in with the kids in the first one. Mom rolls her eyes at Dad in the second careful to make eye contact with the children in the back seat first. She’s saying in effect, “Your father is less than and I want you to know I think that. It’s ok for you to think that too.”
I am sure I would have missed most of this, if I hadn’t seen the commercials 400 times each in 4 days. But I did see them. And it gave me the opportunity to really look at the way in which men are being portrayed. The way women are treating them. They way women are teaching their children to treat their fathers, with contempt.
I love my hubs and my kiddo way too much to stand idly by while a society is built that demonizes them for their penises. Neither chose it. They were born that way. It has zero impact on whether they are good people. It is a physical feature. And it’s not ok to judge anyone by their physical features in my world. Popular idea or not, everyone deserves to be seen for their whole selves, even men.
T.A. Henry 
Even men? You ended this with ‘even men,’ which demonstrates the same attitude you were talking against…or were you just being sarcastic and I missed it. Either way, I SO agree with you that these types of ads are terrible and need to stop. It takes me once to notice it, and I see it all the time from many different companies. Tech companies are the worst and Car companies are next, but it shows up in real estate ads, food ads – everywhere.
And it’s not just men looking goofy or disdained, there are ones where Fathers and the kids do this same eye rolling about Mom. The first of those I remember was the roll-over minutes one. Kids and Dad think the mom is ridiculous for caring about saved minutes but they sarcastically put up with her behind her back.
Other ones have the mom or dad in league with the kids to get one over on the other parent – really blatantly pushing the ‘it’s not wrong if you don’t get caught’ idea and celebrating lying to your parent and/or other parts of your family.
It is one more piece of eroding respect for each other and pushing families apart in our society, and it’s been bothering me for a long time. It’s so pervasive that it’s really hard to boycott companies that use it for marketing. Frustrating! Thanks for speaking out about it.
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It was sarcasm. I suppose it was a bit subtle for the written word. I worry all the time for the kiddo. For the world he will become a man in.
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Ideas and influences come and go. Much has to do with the filters and tools that a child is given to process them with. You’re a good and smart mom, and he’ll be his own man, whatever world he’s in.
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Amen. I really noticed the attitude back when my kids were young. There was this show called The Proud Family. The dad, not only a bumbling idiot but an egocentric arrogant one as well. The mom, gorgeous, wise to solve all problems, and serene.
Equality means just that. Men have strengths as do women. Both deserve respect.
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Indeed.
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